The Perfect Catch

Today, my family decided to fish because according to the caretaker of the pond, it is the best time to fish. So, we hurriedly packed our fishing rods and picnic basket. We arrived at the pond and started to unload our stuff. Our excitement suddenly died down when we found ourselves stuck in a foot-deep clay as we walk towards the edge of the pond. We finally reached the water after 20 minutes of skirmish with the thick heavy mud.

We began to cast our fishing poles in the water and waited for a fish to take a bite of the bait. Dum di dum di doo... nothing....dum di dum di doo...still no fish...dum di dum...we got tired of waiting and just decided to eat. Apparently, the water is too deep for fishing and the fishes are at the bottom of the pond. My mom wanted to hit the caretaker with her muddy slippers after she walked on thick mud for nothing.  She was quickly pacified.

 As we were eating, one of my uncles started to talk about why I am a good catch. Oh dear. Why should choosing a wife and fishing be metaphorically related?

"Basti here, has a good future ahead. Any parent would be thrilled to have a doctor as a son-in-law  who can also cook for their daughters. And with those chinito looks, you're definitely a good catch," he told everyone in the table.

My mom suddenly butted in, "I want my daughter-in-law to be a doctor..and she must be a good cook too! I don't want my son to go hungry!" She was hitting the table with a closed fist, making it more of a demand rather than just a statement. "...and please choose a fertile woman. I want an apo!" she continued. Everybody laughed.

"How about a son-in-law who is a doctor and who cooks well? He's fertile but we can't make a child of our own. We could adopt though to give you an apo." That was running in my mind as I gave them a sneaky smile.

I shoud still consider myself lucky for not being forced into fixed marriage. We are just part Chinese and I was raised with predominantly Filipino culture and traditions. However, my aunts and uncles sometimes play matchmaking with their friends. My sister had been to several dates set up by the family after graduating from post-grad school. I am expecting myself to receive a dose of this matchmaking game two years from now too. That is the tinge of Chinese tradition in our family.

But yeah, lately, I am starting to consider marrying a woman and having a family after seeing my dad again after 7 years (I'll write about that in another post). But who? Isabela is the only girl I've fallen in love with...and yeah... she turned out to be a lesbo. And if I do find a girl, would it be just like casting a bait in the water? Upon taking a bite of my charming lure, she'll realize that everything is merely a deceit

photo from here

Birds of the Same Feather

Flashback

A year ago, Isabela, and I  were in the school cafeteria. She was asking about my date last night. She knew I was on a date, but she didn't know with whom. She was expecting a girl of course. Since I trust her so much, I decided to come out to her. I was so nervous and I didn't know how to start since she would be the first person to know my secret. I opened my mouth but I cannot say a word. I took a deep breath then opened my mouth again, but still, no words came out. She noticed that I was so jittery. She held my hand and said, "Relax Basti, why are you so nervous? Did you do something to her?" Then, she giggled. I sat beside her and whispered in her ear, "I am dating a guy."

Further Flashback

Three years ago, I didn't know anyone in med school. Joining a group is like a must for newbies to avoid being called a loner. So, I joined the first group that invited me to lunch. Isabela was part of it. The group was essentially a show, as we don't really like each other that much; nevertheless, we have to eat with a group so that we won't be branded as losers. Eventually, our group disintegrated as each one of us found the barkada where we really fit in. As for me and Isabela, we were never absorbed by another barkada  because we're already fine and happy with each other. Isabela and I clicked a lot. We are inseparable which made my classmates think that we're a couple. Up to this day, I think, they still believe that we're a couple in denial.

Well, I must admit that there was a time when I developed feelings for her. We're together most of the day, even on weekends. We study together...eat together...and do other things together... well, except for taking a bath. However, my feelings for her just died down eventually.

Isabela and I also have close friends in the class. One of them is Shaira. She has a sister who came to Manila to review for the upcoming civil engineering board exams. Shaira introduced us to her sister, Fatima. Fatima is a lively, talkative girl, who is always the life of the party. She easily gains friends everywhere she goes.

Fatima and Isabela became close. Soon, Isabela also considers Fatima as her bestfriend. I was happy for her because she finally found a girl bestfriend. However, there were times when Isabela would bail out on a dinnerdate with me, reasoning that she already had plans with Fatima. There were several more times when she used those Fatima-excuses. Her life seemed to be revolving around her new best friend. I got fed up and stopped talking to Isabela.

To cut the long story short, after several months, Fatima had to go back home while Isabela and I patched things up.

Just Recently

Isabela went to the city in the southern islands where Fatima lives to spend the Christmas break there.  After the break Isabela sent me a message.

Isabela: "Where are you? I wanna tell you something."

Me: "In a mall."

Isabela: "Can you go here? I'm in our favorite coffee shop."

Me: "Ok. It looks important. Wait for me. I'll be there in a few."

Isabela: "Ok. Thanks. Brace yourself."

Brace yourself... It must be something big. I hurriedly made my way to the coffee shop. It is not that far from where I am at. While walking, I began to speculate about things that she might say.

I arrived at the coffee shop and saw her sipping a cup of coffee. I greeted her and sat on the chair across the table."What is it?" I asked her.

She was smiling but her movements were jittery. It seemed like she wanted to say something but can't express it. It reminded me of someone...me a year ago when I came out to her. She finally leaned forward and placed her lips near my left ear. Then she whispered, "I have a girlfriend."

"Is it Fatima?" I asked her

"Yes, how did you know?" she wondered

"It's so obvious, duh." I replied.

"Kainis ka!" she exclaimed

After that, she told me how it began. I realized that she was already in a relationship with Fatima months before I came out to her.  "Gago ka! Naunahan mo pa pala ako!" I told her.

She then asked me, "Do you think... we clicked...because we're both gay?"

We both burst into laughter.

photo from here

McNerdy

     It's a long weekend and I am planning to spend it in our home in the province. I am currently waiting for our driver who is supposed to drive me home. I must admit, five years after reaching legal age, I still don't know how to drive. Blame it on my driving instructor who kept on shouting at me. My driving lessons did not end well. I don't want to expound the events that happened but to give you a clue, it involves a highway, a farm, a shocked cow who ran for its life and our houseboy losing a tooth.

     Anyway, it's 11:00 pm and I am still waiting, so I decided to write something on this blog. While thinking of something to write, I decided to check out the bibingka stand on the next street. I bought puto bumbong for 25 pesos. I love watching how they prepare it, especially the "taktak" part. I hurried back to my flat where I added grated cheese on the cake topped with coconut and sugar. Yum!

    After indulging in a native treat,  McNerdy went online. I am not sure if there is a romance brewing up between us, but he walks me home everyday. He is so protective of me. He curses drivers who almost hit me ( I am that careless), shares his umbrella when it's raining (I actually have one but I am too lazy to look for it in my bag), carries my heavy surgery book and does other stuff that you would expect from a gentleman. There was one time when he accidentally (really not sure) held my hand while crossing a street, as if I am a little boy crossing the street for the first time. Perhaps, he was thinking of how careless I could be. After that, he took a quick glance at his hand which is still holding mine, then he looked at me. He saw how shocked I was, so he immediately let go and blushed. Anyway, McNerdy sent me  a message in YM, and asked if I am already home.

Basti: Not yet. I'm still waiting for our driver

McNerdy: Ok. Take care then.

Basti: Ikaw? Where are you?

McNerdy: I'm staying, mom and dad are not home.

Basti: Awwww. You must be lonely right now. Haha.

McNerdy: Yeah. I wish I could go out tomorrow with someone. Kaya lang, you're going home.

Basti: Try Rese, she's staying here in Manila too.

McNerdy: Never mind. I'll be ok. Perhaps, I'll go to a coffee shop and hangout there.

Basti: Sure?

McNerdy: Yeah. Promise me you'll bring me pasalubong ha?

Basti: Sure!

     I was in a kilig moment when my phone rang. It was our driver calling. He is finally here. I instructed him to go to my flat while I hurriedly packed my things. Yes, I have been waiting for hours but I haven't packed my things yet. I am a last-minute person which really pisses off my mom. I quickly stuffed my things in my duffel bag: toiletries, dirty clothes, clean clothes, chargers, some transcriptions and highlighters. I just closed my laptop and put it in its sleeve pocket, then I grabbed a textbook, which I probably won't be able to read. Then, I forcefully pulled the zipper shut as I try to jam all my stuff inside my bag.

     "Knock, knock." The driver is here. He carried my stuff as I double checked the gas, and the locks. We went to a nearby 7/11 where I bought him his favorite energy drink (named after a venomous snake), to keep him up and at the same time, keep me alive. Since the rush-hour is over, reaching NLEX was a breeze. As we made our way out of the metro, the dark view of the countryside at night slowly took away my consciousness and I finally dozed off.

Shattered Pieces of Enmity

A sparkling diamond I am not,
Though I’m priceless, an iron, I can’t cut,
A sturdy marble I am neither,
For a majestic temple, I cannot shoulder.

You see me as a stone, for like a stone I am frozen,
Trample upon me, I would roll over but I’ll stay even.
But look keenly, closely and you will see,
I’m as scratched and wounded, as anyone would be.

I am a delicate glass; I contain your woe,
I beseech you, stop filling it, for it will overflow,
Your cold hands that shall touch this fargility,
Shall shatter me into pieces of acrimony.

An Ode to Maternity

From thy womb, thou shall bring forth,
A gift, a blessing, a divine bequest!
Oh precious life, my tribute is worth,
Thou shall restore thy fervor, thy zest!

Thy gift, is now, and shall be thy new life,
A being worthy of thy tears and strife,
For love eternally abounds in a heart of a mother,
An enchanting union with her young forever!

Gain strength, for thou art capable,
Turn a leaf, embark on a voyage anew,
With thy fair young, thy existence is endurable,
For thou art reborn as thypurpose renew.

photo from here

An Elegy to thy Memory, Father

This poem is inspired by the story of my father and I. He is now 81 and has Alzheimer's disease.

An Elegy to thy Memory, Father

In thy existence, a man He bestows,
An invincible figure, as mighty as bellows,
Endowed with prudence, wisdom and astuteness,
Bequeathed to steer thy path towards uprightness.

There was a moment, the gift faltered,
Breaking the chain, left wrecked and shattered,
Every link besieged with immense animosity,
Living stones, cold, bitter, numbed by enmity.

In the midst of achieving epiphany,
There’s no room for absolution and clemency,
For now, as thou rest on that elaborate lumber,
No kind of memoir could make thee remember.

For thy health has turned against thee, as well,
Subtly stealing thy reminiscence, as thou fell,
As I sit with thee, for thee, I am a stranger,
But a voice inside wishes that thou would remember,
That I am thy son and thou art my father.

photo from here

The Nightingale Lamp

I wrote this poem a year ago for my mom. It's my gift to her for Mother's Day. I used my previous profession as an inspiration and unified it with my mom's efforts and sacrifices for me. I integrated history, symbolism and reality in this poem.

The Nightingale Lamp


Through the perilous battlefield,
Pits of death, the soil has yield,
Shadows of darkness have come to reign,
Enthroning misery and nurturing pain!

In the gusty winds, light of hope flickers,
Gasps for breath rumble as monstrous thunders,
Muerte! The Crimean valleys resounded,
The cradle of death has turned thou astounded.

But in the middle of obscurity,
A woman comes with a light of placidity,
On her gentle hands, the lamp of faith rest,
A glimpse of vitality, thy life dearest!

Nightingale’s lamp has leadeth thou back,
To precious life, thou have almost lack,
That radiant glow that shone thy path,
Steered thy way against mortality’s wrath.

In life that is real, scores of battle abound,
The echoes of despair and despondency sound,
But through His grace, a being emerges,
Bearing the lamp of hope, with light that encourages.

In my life a Nightingale lamp has glowed,
From its radiance, thousands of dreams have flowed,
Fulfillment and success would never be bright,
Without the hands that held that luminous light!

Oh precious hands that protect the light,
May your lamp forever shine at human’s sight,
Like a Nightingale lamp thou have brought life,
In the midst of life’s dreadful strife

photo from here