Hello Harry. It has been five months since we broke up and up to now, I still miss you. I have a confession to make. Since you won't reply to my messages, I made a dummy account just to talk to you. Although you know me as someone else, I am very happy to at least know how you're doing now.
By the way, I have moved out of my old apartment. I left our "love dungeon" with a heavy heart but brought with me the memories we had there...the wild sex...the cuddling...the fights...the kisses. I brought with me Xian the panda. He is now guarding my medical books. Tarshie the tarsier is mingling with the angry birds. It could have been nice making love to you in my new place. It has a view of the river and the city skyline.
I remembered the night when I ended up things between us. It was a drizzly night. We were standing under the waiting shed of my old university. You told me that you will watch me from afar, and be happy with my accomplishments even though you're not there by my side. But then, our situation got worse and now, I know that you have no plans of talking to me or knowing how I am doing. I know that you want to bury me in the past and forget that you knew me. I understand that you can never fulfil that promise you left me that night, and so now, I am turning things around. I am here watching over you, loving you from afar.
Basti, like what I told my recent ex why we have to move on, it's because, we just have to.
ReplyDeleteHow painful it is to love from afar.
This is very poignant and raw.
I know. But it is really difficult to get over a perfect guy, especially when I realized that it was I who drove him away. It has been 9 months since the break-up but I am just starting to move on right now.
DeleteWell, i just remind myself of what Paolo Coelho said in his blog: Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life.
Ang hapdi sa puso.
ReplyDelete